Are you always late for things??
Me? Never. Me and Myke? Always. Myke? Always. Notice the pattern?
Do you set your watch/clock to be a teeny bit fast so that you are never late?
No, I spend all my time resetting the clocks back to GMT, as a party trick of Mykes is to have all the clocks to different times. Which explains the above...
Can you ever get the dinner on the table at the time you told everyone it would be ready??
Can I ever get dinner on the table in the first place? No, I'm bollocks at cooking!!!
If you were the White rabbit from Alice in Wonderland, would you wear that silly waistcoat?? If not, what would you wear??
Leather... lots of leather.
If you were Alice would you be so stupid to drink or eat any of that stuff she found??
No, but I'd be sorely tempted by the fit bloke with "blow me" on his chest!